|Emily AC: Multi-Talented Comedian||
So... the list has been compiled for this wave of the data set.
I'm putting it here. Before I go further... I have some important instructions for apprehending these criminals quickly. If EVERYONE PITCHES IN A LITTLE this will happen right away!!!
...this is why I LOVE the capabilities of THE OVERMIND!!!
FOLLOW THESE INSTRUCTIONS TO FIND THE PRETTY GIRLS... AND EVERYONE ELSE THAT WENT MISSING FOR NO GOOD REASON!!!
*SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT HOW A WOMAN JOKINGLY CALLED "THE ANTICHRIST" SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF HORRIBLE PEDOPHILE RAPISTS OVER AND OVER AND OVER!!!
*Make sure people talk about it on the street AND in cyberspace!!!
*The media didn't??? pick up on this??? HOW???!!! It's up to US to find these girls
*The POLICE haven't heard about this??? AGAIN... HOW???!!!
*Walk the streets wearing a special uniform, if you can
--Plain White T-Shirt
+Front says, "#Wherearetheprettygirls"
+Back says, "#AntiChrist
+written in sharpie/black marker
--Jeans/Yoga pants/Khakis/Pajama Pants... for comfortable movement... we're going to dance in the streets and sidewalks to find these girls!!! SURELY THEY MUST BE FINE IF THERE AREN'T HORRIFYING CHILD RAPISTS ROAMING THE STREETS!!!
--Cowboy boots/steel-toed footwear (in case they are real) or sneakers (white or black, prefered. NO RED. Cover red with duct tape.
*Get the whole family out to dance and sing... seeing as the streets are such a SUPER FUN AND SAFE PLACE FOR PEOPLE TO ROAM... NO MATTER WHAT TIME OF DAY!!!
*You might to bring some stuff in case you get BORED
--skateboard to zoom ahead and come back... no big deal
--a magic 8-ball (to tell the immediate future along the way)
--a big, thick branch... obviously to help you walk. That's no crime... you can pretend it's a cane and delight your happy, peaceful children in "Puttin' on the Ritz."
--a baseball bat and a baseball... just in case you see a park nearby and the family wants to go play BASEBALL (ALSO not a crime).
--The head of a teddy bear... because that's morbidly funny... (and, also NOT A CRIME).
*Do this once a day... at different times... until we find the pretty girls... and everyone else missing...
*Once you get home... do a little training with the family for that SUPER-DI-DUPER, UNBELIEVABLE, IMPOSSIBLE SCENERIO of seeing an evil rapist.
--Put that shit up on YouTube and call it "Assassin training for kids of all ages"
--Make it as morbid and funny as you like!!! Because... it's not like well over 100 children went missing FOR NO GOOD REASON... this is just ENTERTAINMENT!!! (Baby's first testicle chomp, for example).
*Now remember... There's nothing wrong with searching for these girls with those things in that outfit... Especially if you're dancing and singing and HAPPY about it!!!
...Because... surely... these over 100 children are just playing hide and seek... trying to get attention from their families.
If we go out and PLAY... (I suggest Paramore's latest, Katy Perry "This is How We Do", or Taylor Swift's new tune to dance to... easy jam tunes for dancing and playing outside).
...we'll find sumthin'