|Emily AC: Multi-Talented Comedian||
So... Seeing the suspicious character on the bike last night made me think that little delusion about the gang members stalking me look even a bit more credible.
I decided to dig a bit in cyberspace on my computer--with all the same shit everyone has access to. It reminded me of a book series that I read and enjoyed, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
That book was so engaging to me that I read the whole series in four and a half days whilst working part time. When the books were all goggled up... I followed with The Hunger Games.
Six books; seven days. Then my brain was literaturally satisfied for a long time... and starting new books was a challenge because it seemed none could compare.
My mom had suggested I read both series... but she'd given me the 1st Tattoo book years prior and I just hadn't read it because I get sick to death of my mom's book genres... Romance novels and spy shit... so stupid!
The only books that my mom read that I ended up liking were the ones that she hated or was confused by. They were usually more relationship oriented... and often times had a meloncholy affect about them.
My mom doesn't like feeling sad. She adores the color yellow... the color of joy. She hates crying for real... only does it for pity and attention. It's as though she fears sadness... because sadness makes you back out of a fight. That makes you a quitter.
According to her... nobody likes a quitter.
I disagree with this notion. People quit for different reasons. If you aren't interested in fighting... you shouldn't be forced to.
No... that's not how nature works. Nature doesn't constantly battle itself! It constantly neutralizes itself! That's the only reason why live exists, at all. Science is very clear about this.
There are long math problems that prove what I say about wavelengths and spectrums... even with emotions. I just don't understand how to deconstruct math problems in numbers and symbols... the math wizard that is also a psych scholar will be able to understand a few simple concepts right away and would be able to devise the formulas.
No... my brother is not one such person. He is a lousy actor, too.
So... while I'm scoping the internet for possible clues to what I suspect... I just remind anyone that nothing can happen to me because everyone will know exactly where to look :)
Of course... if it's just a delusion, then nothing will arouse my curiosity and I'll have to come forward with my hands up and call myself crazy! Which works for the act... but makes things, supposedly, easier for the next guy...
"She thinks everyone is a rapist!" Which has already been said to me.
No... no, I don't. If you stand next to me and we're in a crowd... I'll tell you what everyone's emotional displays are. I'll even be able to tell you which people are experiencing an emotion out of the blue for them, if they're crazy enough...
Like I can tell you when a psycho is having a good day... and also when a usually extremely happy person is suddenly feeling horrendous anger. And I'll tell you how to spot for it.
The guy they'll look for is easy to spot. Extremely bad attitude. Walks around like a cartoonish depiction of a psycho.
When I first blogged about him... I described him as looking like something out of saint's row. I meant the video game.
I didn't actually think that when someone rapes and kills in their spare time... like a game member does... that they jump around and slap their asses and whistle and taunt like a jackass!!!
...I always figured they were serious. Like--don't fuck with me unless you need commerce. I mean... I guess I'm not surprised they rape people that don't do anything...
...I just thought it was done to enemies and stuff.
Well, then... it's too fucking bad they irritated me! Because now Ima play detective... without waltzing the neighborhood. I know just where to start... after I dilly-dally... with my doors unlocked.
...because if it's all in my head... then everything will be gumdrops and butterscotch, won't it be?